I spent Tuesday on the most depressing shopping trip of my life – not because I’m pregnant and can’t fit into anything, but because we were shopping for holiday clothes etc for my husband as he is going to Las Vegas with the boys!
Which leads to the question – Would you allow your husband / partner go on a lads holiday?
Hubby is forever moaning we never go away, but since we’ve been married he has been to Majorca, Portugal and now Las Vegas whereas I’ve not been anywhere until we went to Disneyland Paris in April.
All these trips have been relatively short ones – usually stag do’s and this one is for his best friends 40th but it still leaves me feeling utterly despondent.
I was really excited when the suggestion was made over 2 years ago, until I found out it was boys only, and begrudgingly said hubby could go.
He’s been putting money away ever since and we were a little worried that baby’s arrival was going to clash, but thankfully he will be back in time for the birth (unless I go into early labour).
I remember being annoyed on his last couple of trips but this time seems worse. I know he is planning on a helicopter trip in the Grand Canyon – something I have always wanted to do, the throwing myself off a very tall building whilst attached to a bit of elastic – not so much!
Friends and family both think I am mad letting him go, whereas I see lots of other people doing it – so would you let your OH go on holiday without you?
I’d love to say I will go next year for my 40th – 5* all the way in Dubai maybe, but in reality
a) Can’t afford it
b) I get panicked phone calls if my hairdressing appointment runs over
so I know he wouldn’t cope for more than a day with the kids, and that is if he can get the time off work!
c) I’d rather do something with the family anyway!
In the first instance…LET? He is his own person, you discuss, you put your point over and then he decides whether he wants to go… you shouldn’t LET him go – You may have no objections, but that doesn’t give him permission – He’s your husband not your prisoner
That said, when I go away with friends I take everything into account and fairness is certainly high on the agenda. Is the timing suitable – i.e. is their anything else that the time away will clash with – have we spent an equal (or, I would say, a higher) amount of time together away on trips and/or special events.
It sounds like you don’t mind him going away… just the unfairness of it
Luckily, my partner probably wouldn’t go too far away without us but if he wanted to, I would stand in the way of it. We would obviously discuss finances etc first though.
I’m pretty happy for James to go away but if it is at the detriment of our family (ie it’s stopping us doing things because he’s saving money to go) then I make is clear that it’s not on and if I don’t get the same ‘allowance’ then I’m not a happy bunny!
That said he only really goes away for 1-2 nights on stag does but works away alot x
I can understand why you’re annoyed, so maybe you should try and plan something for next year, you deserve it too! Hubs and I have a weekend or two away each year with our own friends and it does the world of good. It’s hard to find the money to do it, but is so worthwhile. I hope you manage to get your break too.